Re: For Men and Women Alike!!!!!!!!!!!!
BECAUSE MEN AND WOMEN DO NOT THINK ALIKE.
Know how he "THINKS" and you'll get why he never "UNDERSTANDS" you.
Men tend to objectify situations
Men tend to focus on results
Men open up more when they get acceptance, trust and appreciation
From early childhood and up, males are often complimented about what they do, what they've done, what their results are, and women are complimented on who they are, how they are being, and of course how they look. So it's no wonder that men like knowing they've done a good job - created a good result - women like knowing they've done a good job and the result compliments who they are.
Men go from point A to point B. They are focused on getting from here to there as efficiently as possible, and making a difference along the way. You see this in sports, as they get the ball from here to there, make the point, score the goal. A man instinctively focuses on his goal and what's right in front of him, so it's easy for him to switch his attitude by getting off problem A and looking at situation B.
His tendency to focus can tend to create problems and misunderstandings with the opposite sex. For example, when under stress, a man will tend to be more focused than usual. At such times, he tends to exclude other things that are important, if they are not in his immediate view. Let's say his wife has asked him to take out the garbage an hour ago. If he's focused on fixing a passage in a musical sequence, he may forget that she's asked him to take out the trash! He's not forgetful on purpose, it's just his style of thinking.
Men's Needs and Styles
Thank you's
Appreciation
Let go and...
Trust
Don't try to change me
Acceptance
Acknowledgement
Best
Efficiency-oriented
Optimum
Need to be right, noble
You're right
Because men need primarily need to feel trusted, one of the biggest mistakes a woman can make is to give unsolicited advice, even though this is an aspect of her caring style. Offering help, without being asked may say to him that you don't trust him to have the answer. Men want you to wait till he asks for advice, before giving it. Many women become frustrated when they hear this. They say, "If I cant' give advice, how do I get what I want?" The secret is to ask for what you want in a positive way. By learning to ask for more, in a non-demanding way, most women are surprised at how much more support they will receive!
Ask men questions instead of giving advice. Asking a question lets him "stay in charge" and "save face." A man always wants to be the knight in shinning armour, even if he is just simply driving to the theater!
__________________
"I don't understand why I'm not dead. When your heart breaks, you should die. But there's still the rest of you. There's your breasts and your genitals... They're amazingly stupid, like babies or faithful dogs. They don't get it."
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